Questioning Week: God

Today I ask questions about God but before i do a little background would be good. My parents divorced some nearly 5 years ago. Since then things haven’t been exactly easy for my mum. She’s always been short on cash and can’t seen to be able to do much. She’s a very strong Christian. My dad has had smooth sail as far as I can tell, very well paying top job and new wife. He has lives quite comfortably. I’ve never seen him in a church or praying in all my life.

My mum believes that my dad will one day pay for the sins he has committed, and believe me they’re not small ones, that God will have the last word, that her blessing is coming. Well that last word is taking its sweet time to arrive! I’m not trying to be blasphmas or anything but there’s only so much time someone can wait.

When I was in my last year school I believed that God had told me that sometime soon after I left school that things were  going to change, that I’d find things changed. I prayed that year, a lot. I remember telling God that if that didn’t happen I was gone, for good, that I’d stop caring about obeying His laws and begin to live life on my own rules.

It’s been nearly two years since I told Him that.

Nothing has changed as far as I can see and the status quo remains the same. So what does that mean for me? Well I left God and all that behind for a time. I stopped praying at all, didn’t read the bible and scorned anything said in church(I still went because it’d’ve hurt my mum so if I stopped). There was even I time I would get so angry at the sermon that I wanted to scream at the pastor! I’d leave church those times.

But I couldn’t remain impartial to what I saw and I have a brian. I thought about it long and hard and decided that there was a God somewhere after all this a round us had to have been created by someone or something. Its all too neatly arranged too perfectly formed. But what i ahven’t decided on is if he cares? Or he just look down and think look about what a poor disappointment we turned out to be? If he hasn’t turned his back on us, why aren’t the murderer, liars, cheats and rapists been punished? But far more importantly why keep some one so faithful to him like my Mum waiting for His justice? After all that he’s not done do you really blame me for asking does God give a damn? Peace.