So I’m sitting in the balcony at my dad’s place, writing this post and thinking of exactly how to do it. I have been out here i a while and it feels good to be out in the fresh air of Uppah. My sister is in one of her moods because she’s coming back from her weekend with my mum. She always comes back like this and I’m wandering if its really doing her any good but thats a story for another post…
Today’s post is actually about my weekend. This last one. And no its not one of crazier ones. Its was actually quiet normal and boring. I was home alone this weekend. For most my age that would’ve been the perfect excuse to throw a party or go out all weekend but I didn’t do any of that. On Friday I went to school and came directly home to watch movies. Saturday I was in church most of the day though later I went to my friends house to pick up some cables I’d asked him to get for me. Sunday I woke up to find the day overcast so there went my plans for swimming and also the electricity had gone, so I began to read His Dark Materials:The Golden compass.
So thats how I spent my weekend. Pretty dull, right? And this weekend got me thinking,well actually been thinking about it for a couple of weeks on and off sub-consciously, am I normal teenager? Normal teenagers would have gone crazy but I didn’t. Its not the first time. For me I would comfortably spend a weekend alone with my girlfriend watching movies and lazying around doing a lot of nothing or with my best friend telling stories and watching movies. Unfortunately for me, my best friend left the country in Dec for school and I have no girlfriend.
On Saturday I found out there was a birthday party for a friend(?) of mine that people had gone to in L.A. I didn’t get an invite so I only found out like at 10.p.m and by that time buses out of Uppah had died and i was too broke to take a taxi anywhere. But it got me thinking…Why hadn’t I gotten an invite? And why hadn’t any one tried to call me to ask wether I could make it? After all I knew(I was later to hear) most of the people at the party.
I came to the conclusion that it was because I wasn’t part of that crew. After all all the people there were from L.A and had grown up together so I was kinda an outsider. I don’t think think they did it on purpose though. Let me explain the crew dynamic and what I mean by crew. A crew is a group of people with something in common that binds them together. It could be that you grew up together or that you go/went to the same school. These are the people you’re tight with,you gel together and enjoy each others company. They’re also the people you call when ever you have an event you want to celebrate or generally just hang out. Still it stings that no one thought of inviting me.
So back to what I was saying I’ve recently coming to the realization that I have no friends that I can randomly call to over at my place when its free. And I’m wandering why that is…and I realize that after my best friend left the country I’ve been kind of lonely when it comes to someone you can just call over and chill with. Someone you can get bored with and still say you where having fun. So I’ve came to the realization that I relied on my best friend a little more than I realized…
This is the balcony after I was finished writing…
So why did I put up this post? I just need to vent and to ask all of you:Am I normal? Let me know what you think in the comments.Btw I realized, while writing this, there is someone I could call but they’re so far away right now.PEACE!!
It depends on what normal is. But you should know that you are phasing out of the teenager phase so if you don't feeling like partying all the time, just know that life is catching up with you. But I wouldn't mind spending the weekend on my own just reading or just doing something random.
I also like being on my own and yes, there are times I have felt alone and generally friendless. I am also at a stage where I am re-evaluating my 'real' friends and see who I can really count on in times of need and in times of plenty. Its hard getting someone like that, harder even if the same person you're looking for is a girl/boyfriend!
Don't worry. The right people will come your way. Its always nice to be yourself, you know.
I didn't realise that there were comments here, I'm sorry for replying so late.
@deadly_halo Yeah I get what you're saying but I don't see anyone else doing the alone thing my age except you.
@Joliea Yes, but still it gets difficult…
I didn't realise that there were comments here, I'm sorry for replying so late.
@deadly_halo Yeah I get what you're saying but I don't see anyone else doing the alone thing my age except you.
@Joliea Yes, but still it gets difficult…